Monday, January 28, 2008

Wishing and Hoping for Spring

You'll never guess what... The wind is blowing. Yep, again. Or maybe I should say "still." Today is the worst... Up to 50 mph was predicted and I think it has been gusting to ever bit of 50 and then some. My eyes itch, my head hurts, and my sinus cavities and ears feel like they might burst from the pressure. I took a chance and walked out to get the mail after lunch. Days like today you really don't have to worry about fixing your hair. You don't even really need to brush it if you plan to go outside. I looked better when I first got up this morning than I did after going out after the mail. It is a miserable day.

Though it is windy, it is not cold. I've seen days in January when the wind has blown 50 mph and the temperatures were below freezing. That makes for a VERY miserable day. But today, it is warm. For that I am thankful. A big dark cloud blew up, and a few drops of rain fell, settling just a tiny bit of the dust in the air. The sound of the raindrops on the window somehow made the howl and whistle of the wind less annoying for a little while.

When I went out for the mail, a "feeling" swept over me. Not at all like the feeling I have every fall. You remember? That feeling of dread and anxiety. No, this time it was a feeling of hope. The warm wind and the dark clouds hinted of spring. I guess most folks think about blooming flowers and singing birds when they think of spring. But when you grow up in the Texas Panhandle, you think of wind. For it is the wind, slightly warm and really high wind, that is the first sign that spring is on its way. We don't associate too many blossoming trees with spring because, in the first place, we don't have too many trees. And if the few little trees we do have decided to bloom, they either get hit with a late freeze or the wind just blows those pretty little flowers away before anyone can notice they are there. As for singing birds, well when the poor little sparrow opens his mouth to sing, the wind blows the song right back down his little throat and out his tail feathers. So, it is dirt in the air, messy hair, and one dark cloud that gives me hope that winter won't last forever.

Don't get me wrong now. Snow is in the weather forecast for Thursday. Winter isn't over until the mesquite trees put out, and that won't be until after our normal "Easter spell." Why the groundhog hasn't even seen his shadow yet (and we know he will) so we still have plenty of winter time left. But today, the wind howls its song of hope.

Come on spring!!! I'm ready for ya!

Monday, January 21, 2008

Home

Home vs. Hospital....Hummm. Yes, home is always better.

My daughter and new granddaughter finally got to come home from the hospital today. Patricia is very tired but she is hanging in there. I am very tired too, but even more relieved that her pain is currently under control and she can be with both her girls and husband.

The little cot in the corner of the hospital room, where I spent the last two nights, served its purpose, but my bed in the guest room sure does look good tonight. I plan to rest well. Looking at the inviting mattress and contemplating how good it will feel beneath my aching back, I am reminded of the words of Jesus when he tested some who said they would follow Him wherever He went.
"The foxes have holes, and the birds of the air have nests; but the Son of Man has nowhere to lay His head." Matthew 8:20.
You know, when I stretch out every night to go to sleep, I rarely give thought to the fact that I am protected by a roof and walls. Nor do I often wonder what life would be like if I had no place to rest, to lay my head. So, I have to ask myself, "Just what am I willing to do without for the sake of Christ? And where am I willing to go as I follow Him? Absolutely anywhere?" I will be wise to examine myself more often.------

Home is always a good place to be, but even better, it seems, after spending several days in a hospital.

Friday, January 18, 2008

Grandchildren

Yes, it has been a while since I posted, but I've been busy. I've been spending a lot of time playing with Natalie. A twenty month old, extra bright and energetic, can fill my day to the brim. She loves computers and every time she see mine up and running, she wants to "help" me or play a Veggie Tale game. She types really quickly, but doesn't spell well yet.

I will always cherish these days I've had with her and her parents and now her new baby sister. Gabriella made her way into the world on the 16th. Cute, sweet, and so tiny and innocent. She and her Mommy are still in the hospital due some spinal complications, but after two attempts with a blood patch, Patricia is now feeling a little better. If all goes well this evening, they will come home tomorrow. We are all looking forward to that!

I've decided there is nothing sweeter on the planet than grandchildren. (At least my grandchildren are the sweetest thing on the planet!) They are God's reward and gift to us for not killing our own kids when we were exasperated parents.

When I hold those sweet little girls and hear Natalie call, "Mimi!" from the other end of the house, I know God is good, and I am a blessed woman.

Tuesday, January 8, 2008

And Still the Wind Blows

Just a little update for those of you who want to know what is going on.

Rick is still on the move. Since he left here on Friday, he has driven through portions of six different states, through blizzards, ice, flurries, up and down mountains, and still he drives. When he left here, he didn't know for sure where he was going. As he drove, he learned he was to have meetings in Sacramento, then work in Oregon. Farther down the road he found out that he was going to work in California, east of San Fransisco. Slick roads and heavy snow prevented him from making it to California by his appointed time, but allowances were made and he continued on. Yesterday, just as he was about to cross the Nevada/California line, his company decided to send him to Idaho to work. That meant that he had to back track almost 500 miles of his journey back to Salt Lake City before heading northward into Idaho. If the Lord wills, he will make it to his destination late today. Talk about a long commute!!!

Rick is very tired of driving. Yesterday evening he called and told me that after driving all afternoon, he was spending the night in the same town where he ate lunch. On Rick's behalf I just want to say, "Good Grief!" He is a patient man, and though frustrated, he is taking all this pretty well.

My beloved hates the cold. Average high temperatures in the area where he will be working are in the 30s. Lows are in the teens. I hurt for him, and I pray for him. I admire him; he is my hero.

Here at home we are still waiting on Gabriella to decide to make her way into the world. Natalie has decided to call me "Meme," and we are having fun with each other. Other than that, there is no new news, and the wind is still blowing.

Saturday, January 5, 2008

Not A Good Day

Some days I would like to forget. Yesterday was one of those days. To begin, it was windy. West Texas windy. I'm not talking the gentle breeze that most people across our great land call wind. I'm talking wall creaking, window rattling, you-can't-stand-still-in-it, 40+ mph and gusting kind of wind. The wind makes me crotchety!

Early in the day Rick headed to Dumas to help his parents with a remodel project. Even before he got started, he received a call putting him on "stand-by" for deployment, and by lunch time he received another call instructing him to hit the road with an uncertain northwestward destination.

I spent the morning getting Rick's laundry done up and removing my "essentials" from the fifth wheel. (I am staying behind because Gabriella is due in just a couple of weeks.) I put air in my flat tire, then I rushed to town for a few grocery items to stock the camper's pantry and skipped lunch to get everything ready for his departure. I hate the routine. Little to no advanced notice, running on adrenalin, working like crazy, then waving good-bye. Afterwards I usually have to cry for a little while before I can continue on.

Rick left shortly before sundown intending to make it to Northern California by Sunday evening. He is to be in orientation somewhere in California Monday morning and will be working in Oregon after that. (He needs your prayers.)

The day before yesterday we did a little furniture shifting which left the guest room (now my room) in our home without a bed. So with the wind slowing a little and the sun already below the horizon, Rebecca and I started getting my mattress and boxed springs out of the storage trailer and hauling them into the house.

Now picture a 90 pound weakling and an old fat lady carrying a queen sized mattress in the dark and in the wind, and you might laugh too hard to finish reading this post, but stick with me here, it's not funny.

Between the grunting, tugging, lifting, and dropping, we didn't notice that my granddaughter's beloved puppy darted out the door while we were trying to get the bed in the house. Zoey, a black Malti-poo quicker than the speed of light and darker than the night, escaped out the opened door and the opened gate. No one in the house knew she was out. Within only a matter of minutes my son-in-law pulled into our long dark drive, and Zoey, invisible in the night, dashed under his van. We are all very sad. Natalie loved her very much. (I cried again.)

I was about too tired to wiggle and emotionally spent, but I took the body to town for proper disposal, picked up an Arby's sandwich, and came home to put sheets on the bed so I could collapse. When I started to make the bed, my mother's ring caught on the mattress and snagged it something awful. That's when I noticed that sometime during the day the mounting had been damaged and now the diamond, Patricia's stone, was lost. (I cried again.)

Sleep didn't come easy, but I was glad to see the day end. I hope today is better, but the wind is blowing again. I'm tempted to just stay in bed with the covers over my head.

Wednesday, January 2, 2008

Life After The Holidays

Well, it is all over: Thanksgiving, Christmas, New Year's Day -- now today is January 2, 2008. Am I the only one that feels a sense of let-down? For weeks now we've had something to anticipate, something to look forward to, something for which we needed to prepare. But today, what is it that will keep me pressing on toward tomorrow, or the next day, or the day after that?

I really want to curl up and nap until life decides to offer me something worthy of my time and energy. I guess I'm getting old. Each year I find it harder to gather the courage and energy to run out and "grab life by the horns." I seem to want to just sit and wait. I don't know what I'm waiting on, but just sitting by and waiting is comfortable.

I guess I had better adjust my attitude a bit. I have no great hopes, dreams, aspirations, or expectations for 2008. I have no idea where I'm going or what I will do when I get there. (Has anything changed since I was 13?) I can't remember a time in my life when I truly lived "one day at a time" as much as I do now.

I feel kind of like those kids of Israel who wandered around in circles eating manna and quail, asking "Are we there yet?" It took them 40 years to get to where they were going. Gee whiz, I hope I can get things figured out and find my way to wherever I am supposed to be quicker than that! If not, I'll be too old to recognize my destiny! And I hate to think that I might be one to die in the desert of wandering.

What is the solution? What should I do to adjust my attitude? Hummm. Seek. Yes, that might just be the thing for 2008. Simply stop wandering around aimlessly and seek. Maybe that is why I feel like there is nothing to do but wait. Seeking is active, but it is not necessarily an activity. I can sit and wait while seeking. I don't have to grab life by the horns! Whew!!! So, I will press on toward tomorrow, looking for direction. I will seek a goal and an aspiration. I will seek a destination. (I just hope it doesn't take me 40 years!)